Congratulations!

August 2019

“Congratulations! We are going to go with a due date of April 13, 2020!” Little did I know that I would be bringing a baby into the world during a pandemic. I honestly don’t think COVID really hit me or had some sort of impact on me until I got the phone call that my prenatal education classes were cancelled. (Luckily, I already attending most of the classes and got a tour of L&D)

Healthy & Happy

September 2019 - January 2020

I went through a completely normal healthy and happy pregnancy in what was then a “normal” world. Thank you baby! 

It Won’t Happen To Us

February 2020

I remember hearing something about the Coronavirus on the news and making a joke about it to my husband that an illness was named after a beer. Let’s be real- I don’t think any of us could have imagined what was in store for our world at that time. 

It Happened To Us

March 2020

As the days passed and the news became a daily log for case counts and how much COVID has spread, I could feel myself start to get a feeling that the end of my pregnancy was not going to play out as I had planned. On March 13, the school that I teach at (like many other schools) had closed. My maternity leave was not supposed to start for three more weeks. I didn’t get to say goodbye to my students or my teacher friends. The worst was yet to come and I had NO idea. My original birth plan was to have my husband and my mom in the delivery room. Well, that plan got changed and the rule was only one person (no switching people allowed.) My mom is a nurse and feared getting sick and passing COVID to me and/or baby. Keeping in mind that my parents live about 10 minutes from me made it even more difficult. At one point, I broke down. I NEEDED my mommy! I had to see her and hug her. See, my mom is my absolute best friend and I know not being able to be physical with me was hard for both of us. Being quarantined for the last few weeks of my pregnancy was a blessing yet a curse. I was able to relax, get some freezer to crockpot meals prepped, spend time with my dogs, and make sure the house was cleaned without the stress of my full-time job. Downside was not being able to go ANYWHERE public with my husband and enjoy being just us before the baby arrived or see any of my friends or family in person. Needless to say, we did a LOT of walking!!!! I forgot to mention, that after my last ultrasound appointment (thank gosh I invited my mom along with my husband and I!), my husband wasn’t allowed to come to any other prenatal appointments. 

It’s A Boy!

April 2020

More walks. More FaceTime dates with my parents. More news stories of fatalities. More closures. It was finally starting to sink in that I will actually be giving birth to a tiny baby during this crazy time. What in the world?? On April 7, we went for another walk. On the way home, my back started to hurt. Pain went away. Mike and I were debating on what to DoorDash (a lifesaver BTW) when my back pain kept coming back. After playing phone tag with my doctor’s office and the on call doctor, we went to the hospital! When we got to the hospital, my husband and I went to the screening stand outside, got our temperatures taken, were asked all the questions, got our masks and were sent up to the maternity floor. My doctor admitted me for labor because I was 4cm dilated and Ezra was on his way. Right away, we got settled into my room and I video called my mom. I basically had her on the phone the whole time from about 7pm to 5am. I wasn’t too shocked with my nurses and doctor wearing masks because they were medical professionals. I am thankful that I had to wear oxygen for a while because wearing the other mask was just something else to add to the list of labor things. Fast forward an epidural and 11 hours and YAY!!!! I gave birth to a beautiful, healthy baby boy! Ezra James was born at 5:53 am and was 7 pounds, 2 oz, 21 inches long. 

When I pictured what it would be like at the hospital, I pictured my parents, in laws, and Nana sitting in the waiting area, anxiously awaiting Ezra’s arrival.  While I did miss my family and friends during this time, it was really nice having time to bond with Ezra and enjoy the first few days together. I do need to give a major shout out to my nurses, doctors, and staff at WellSpan Good Sam. A major illness was spreading, yet they put myself and all other patients first and gave me and my precious son the best care I could have asked for. I will always be grateful for all of their care!

The first month of motherhood was HARD. I knew it was going to be a major adjustment but I had no idea that our family would have to do window visits for the first month of Ezra’s life. On Mother’s Day weekend, my husband and I decided that a month was long enough. Ezra needed to feel the warmth of his grandparents and hear their voices. So, as long as our parents wore masks in the house and religiously used hand sanitizer, they could come in and hold him. Wow— that was an amazing feeling! My parents did our grocery shopping for the first month or two which was a big help, especially because the grocery store strongly encouraged one person and there was no way I was taking Ezra out in public yet! 

In my prenatal education classes, my instructor talked about postpartum depression. While I don’t think I had a crazy case of PPD, I am certain that it was there. COVID certainly didn’t help, and I am sure that my mental health took a dive because of these two major life changes. But, with the help of some personal development videos on YouTube, pep talks to myself and with my friends, I can feel myself start to get back to where I used to be—mentally anyway! Check on your friends. Your mom friends. Your teacher friends. Your healthcare friends. Everyone is fighting a battle that you may not know about and something as simple as asking how their day is going or can go a long way. 

The only time I was in public was to take Ezra to his doctor’s appointments. I had to take him by myself because they’re only allowing one person with each patient. If my husband went along, they would have made him sit in the car. It was incredibly difficult taking Ezra for his shots by myself. The first time I went and had to wear a mask was strange to me. I didn’t go anywhere up until then so wearing a mask felt so bizarre. 

Now that Ezra is almost 6 months (so basically since we’ve been quarantined), I’ve been more comfortable taking him out with me. If I’m going to be a store for a while, I will put him in my baby carrier that I wear on the front of my body. This protects him from other people! If I’m putting him in the stroller while still in the car seat, I put a cover over top. It’s basically like his own little mask! Don’t get me wrong, I’m still taking precautions when we go out. I have a hand sanitizer everywhere— on the baby carrier, diaper bag, my wallet, in the car, and in the backseat for when I nurse Ezra in the car. I would probably be more open about breastfeeding Ezra in public, but I’m trying to minimize the amount of exposure he may have to COVID.  I’m definitely cleaning things more often and using hand sanitizer than before but I’m not sure if it’s just because of COVID or baby. More likely a combination of both. There are still so many family members and friends that Ezra hasn’t met yet. Thanks, COVID. It’s so hard but I just don’t want to take any chances. 

Adjusting to motherhood and getting back into the groove of teaching with a pandemic thrown in there has definitely been quite the experience. Something that has been easier than I thought has been Ezra going to daycare. I was extremely concerned about where he was going to go. Let’s be real- daycare is incredibly expensive at most places and it can be scary to take your little baby and leave them with someone you don’t know. There are SO many stories out there. Luckily, Ezra goes to an in-home family daycare and I could not be any happier with the amount of love and care he’s receiving. Not to mention, there are only 4 other kiddos there. None of which are school age, so that’s less stress and less people for Ezra to come into contact with. I have been trying to get everything done at school that I can so I don’t have to bring a lot home with me. It’s extremely difficult because the times that I would usually plan, I now focus my energy to pumping. On a good day, Ezra is asleep by 7-730 and after washing bottles and pump parts, I try to spend as much time as I can with my husband, whether it’s watching Catfish or browsing Amazon to shop for Christmas. Unlike my colleagues, I did not have the experience of teaching virtually because of being on maternity leave. At one point, I contemplated not officially taking my leave and just sticking it out to teach virtually. Boy am I thankful for one of my teaching gals who told me I was crazy if I was going to do that. Being able to spend the first 4.5 months with Ezra was incredible, even with COVID getting in the way. 

I don’t think any of us could have predicted we would still be dealing with COVID right now. I truly hope we can get back to somewhat normalcy. I know that this is our new normal but I want to go back to where we don’t have to check temperatures every day, wear face masks all the time, or be conscientious and wonder if the person you’re behind in the grocery store may have COVID. I want to be able to give Ezra the best childhood. I just hope he’s able to have an unabridged version. One without masks. One where he’s able to play tag with his friends. I’m anxiously waiting for Ezra to get older and ask why everyone is wearing masks in all of his baby pictures!