Maryland Counseling Associates

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Effective Communication Leads to Healthy Relationships

Written by Olivia Philips

Communication is a skill that helps us form all kinds of relationships, whether they are work related or personal. Everyone has their own perspective and communicates based on their personal views. With focus on romantic relationships, I am here to provide effective communication skills for one to use with a partner to nurture a healthy relationship. 

Firstly, it is important to understand the basics of communication. There are two kinds of communication; verbal and non-verbal. Non-verbal communication involves facial expressions and mannerisms that express emotions without using words (Bannon et al., 2020). Individuals use non-verbal communication more than we think, which is why it is such a big concern in relationships. When an individual is experiencing an emotion, they might decide to not verbally express it to their partner, often, the emotion is expressed through their facial expressions or mannerisms. This is how assumptions are made and leads to conflict. Verbal communication is the use of words to express emotions or thoughts. Both non-verbal and verbal communication are used when engaging in conversation. Being on the same page as your partner and using the effective communication skills I have provided below will help couples foster a healthy relationship. 

To dig even deeper, communication involves interactions made possible through finding a common ground and setting goals in the relationship (Bannon et al., 2020). So, aligning both partners non-verbal and verbal communication styles help partners navigate conflict together. I want to emphasize the concept of alignment. Communication is a two-way street. Again, both parties in the relationship have their own perspective. Furthermore, both partners must be willing to align their communication skills to problem-solve in their relationship. Partners tend to base the quality of their relationship on understanding, connectedness, and problem-solving (Bannon et al., 2020). And evidence has shown that better problem-solving skills lead to better relationship satisfaction and longevity (Bannon et al., 2020). Further emphasizing effective problem-solving communication skills in relationships to maintain a healthy one. 

The skills I am going to list below aid in practicing active listening. Active listening in a relationship setting gives your partner full attention to completely understand them (Grande, 2020). This may seem like a basic concept, but many couples struggle with this. In stressful situations, emotions arise, and partners start to talk over the other which creates more tension. Every person wants to be heard and understood, especially by their romantic partner. Here are some skills to utilize:

  1. First, let us start with a non-verbal skill to show your partner you have their attention. Sit facing towards them and maintain eye contact with them the whole time (Degges-White, 2023). Importantly, have a welcoming and positive attitude by not crossing your arms. Ensure your partner knows that you want to be there and welcome the conversation. 

  2. When bringing up an issue with a partner make sure you reflect on your thoughts and take responsibility for your own actions (Degges-White, 2023). Continue maintaining coordination with your partner because you both want what is best for the relationship. 

  3. Don't interrupt your partner! Let them finish their thoughts and respond respectfully. 

  4. Then, ask questions and restate what your partner said to let them know you understood (Grande, 2020). This is an important active listening skill. 

  5. Think of some solutions to a problem. List some ideas like “Maybe we could try this...,” “I am going to work harder at doing this...” (Degges-White, 2023).

Look at a relationship as having three aspects, there is the couple and then communication. Both parties must build communication skills that work best for their relationship. Additionally, both parties must put effort into communicating with each other fostering a healthy relationship. 

References

Andersen, C. H. (2023, November 15). 20 relationship communication quotes to strengthen your love. The Healthy.

https://www.thehealthy.com/family/relationships/relationship-communication-quotes/

Bannon, S. M., Taggart, T. C., Kehoe, C. M., & O’Leary, K. D. (2020). Collaborative communication efficiency is linked

to relationship satisfaction in dating couples. Personal Relationships, 27(2), 385–400. https://doi-org.proxy-

tu.researchport.umd.edu/10.1111/pere.12319

Degges-White, S. (2023, October 10). 10 steps to effective couples communication. Psychology Today.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/lifetime-connections/201605/10-steps-to-effective-couples-

communication

Grande, D. (2020, June 2). Active listening skills. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/in-it-

together/202006/active-listening skills#:~:text=Active%20listening%20is%20a%20way,office%20to%20

the%20business%20world.